Ask Sheikh Mosh-Killa
Got a problem? Well, you will be accountable to God and History.
Dear Mr MK,
I am still new to Egypt and scared to leave my house… I have stocked up on hot dogs and bottled water in anticipation of another country-wide shutdown. What else do you think I should buy and could you possibly sort out a delivery service for me?
Number one: Due to their phallic shape, eating hot dogs, especially as a woman, is haram. They were invented by the heathens and blasphemes of the West and eating a hot dog makes you accountable to God and History. It represents the shadow of evil within all of us. A hot dog is the Devil’s penis.
Number two: The world will end on 2012 as the Mayans predicted, but only for you, not for us. There’s no point in stocking up. God likes us more; we don’t eat hot dogs.
Number three: You shouldn’t leave your house without your mehrem anyway. Please stock up on termis if you have to, and in the future only speak when you’re spoken to, woman.
It’s really hard to meet new people in Egypt. I keep seeing the same people at the same places and it’s seriously impacted my love life. Where can I meet a new guy without it being creepy (like online dating)?
I recently found out through el7asheshbkam that I’ve been overpaying for hash. What should I do?
- Previous Article I Got Banged!
- Next Article Morsi Time!