Tuesday 6 of December, 2022
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The New Toyota Pious?

Toyota Saudi Arabia has announced that they'll be offering prayer-rug furnished cars.

Staff Writer

Since the invention of the automobile, car companies have been trying to gouge  consumers, selling them on the latest must-have add-on features. It used to be all about the automatic door locks and air conditioning, but not anymore. Toyota have poised themselves to be the first major car manufacturer to consider just how much money Saudi Arabians actually have, and are offering the option of prayer-rug furnishings in their cars. Yes, all the fabric in the car will be 100% made of religious prayer-rugs, hand-woven by Saudi women, ensuring a safer drive to heaven.

Surely these cars will sell well since Saudi Arabians love to waste money, but we here at CairoScene believe that there’s much more money to be made and Toyota is not pushing themselves far enough.

Here is where we imagine the future of religious driving is heading:

Speakers will be equipped with automatic prayer calls but each speaker will have a different sheikh saying the Adan so it replicates the feeling of being in the street and hearing the prayer call from different directions.

The car will be equipped with Niqabi windows, meaning all windows will be tinted except for little slits at eye level so women riding in cars can be covered at all times.

The dashboard will be equipped with a built in Qu'ran display and a compass that only directs you to Mecca. It will also have satellite radio that will only have channels of Imams reciting Qu'ran in all the different Arabic dialects.

The car horn will be extra loud and will be programmed to say ‘istaghfarallah el 3azeem’ and the brake lights will be replaced with Ramadan fawanees.

The glove compartment will be equipped with a Zamzam water fountain so that you can etwada anywhere, and the car's high roof, stow away back seats and built-in divider make it convenient for both men and women to pray at the same time in the same place.

As for naming the vehicle, Toyota already has a Prius in production, so perhaps the best name for this car is the Pious.

You're welcome, Toyota.