Thursday March 28th, 2024
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Bido: Cairo’s Criminally Underrated Burger Place

With a humble locale, a loyal fan base and a full roster of bomb-ass burgers, Bido is one of Cairo’s most underrated hidden food gems right in the heart of Heliopolis.

Staff Writer

What makes a good burger? Feels like an existential question, doesn’t it? I mean it isn’t exactly quantum entanglement, right? Do you not like answering questions? Would you like to ascend? Horseplay aside, anyone can make a burger, but making a good burger? Not an easy task friend; you might have the freshest buns, the juiciest meats and the most creative assortment of toppings and condiments, but if it lacks heart, if it doesn’t have emotion, and special shit involved in the process, it’ll just be another meaty brick in the wall.

So it was an honest surprise that a place as low-key and unassuming as Bido would give me and many others some much needed juicy shock and awe; situated off of Omar Ibn El Khattab Street near Ismaileya Square in Heliopolis, Bido is pretty much just a hole in the wall counter with a kitchen that serves some of the most dense, juicy and satisfying burgers and authentic Egyptian sandwiches Cairo has ever had the privilege of tasting.

Their selection isn’t particularly outlandish or “artisanal” like so many other high-end establishments, but the simplicity of it all adds tremendously to the experience. My first foray into Bido was when a dear friend of mine told me “there’s a cheap burger place.” That’s usually all the convincing it takes me, so we went and I decided to try their most famous burger, the aptly named uuhh…..famous burger (I get paid to do this); a massive, expertly griddled patty with caramelized onions (the best kind of onions fight me nerd), a cut of crunchy beef bacon, a healthy dose of mushrooms, cheese (can’t really embellish this can I) and their patent-pending “Bido sauce,” which I can only assume is a mixture of gnome tears, mustard, happiness and sugar. Taking your first bite out of this thing will be a much warmer, happier memory than any sexual experience you’ll probably have (I believe in you), and that’s just one of the burgers they have on offer, their cheeseburger is an improvement on perfection, and if you spring for the egg and cheese burger? You’ll never need to go to therapy again (please don’t stop going though).

In addition to their bomb-ass burgers, they also offer more traditional sandwich options; Alexandrian liver with leyya, lamb sausage as well as Alexandrian style sogo2 in your choice of baladi or fino bread, or their Bido spin on the classic Hawawshi (or as one of our previous writers used to call it, Hameowshi). All of Bido’s offerings are bargain priced and offer some of the best bang for buck you can ever get in Cairo, the only real complaint I have with Bido is that their burger buns are a bit too meh and sugary, and the sides aren't exactly dazzling either. Although, things may have changed since last I was there.

So grab your friends, family, cat, dog or iguana and hightail it the fuck over to Bido, forget that gourmet bullshit and sink your teeth into a Famous. Would I lie to you? Sometimes.