Simply Ex: Egypt’s First Company Dedicated to Sexual Pleasure
[NSFW. Over 18s only]. What if we told you an unsuspecting piece of furniture could change your sex life? We illustrate all the different ways Simply Ex can do that for you; an Egyptian brand on a mission to reignite passions.
It’s not every day you find an Egyptian company that dares mention the pleasures of sex, let alone promote them. Excluding a few dodgy premature ejaculation pills, with terribly offensive adverts, few local companies even consider that there’s more to sex than making babies. So we when we came across Simply Ex – an Egyptian furniture company that makes unique, customisable couches, designed to increase sexual pleasure – we had to find out more.
With a handful of different designs, each Simply Ex product looks like an innocent couch or futon, with great fabrics and sleek edges, pretty much perfect for any home. With the curtains drawn and the lights dimmed however, couples will find that there’s more to these modern pieces of furniture than meets the eye. Sex in bed is so outdated. These products are ready to bring out your wild side...
Take for example the aptly named Whisper. To the naked eye, it looks like an awesome curved couch, perfect for cocooning on in front of the TV. To the naked couple, however, things get exciting. The curve makes for a comfortable saddle for cowgirls, if you know what we mean, while the cowboy’s back is fully supported. Detach the centrepiece and free your love making by placing it on a counter for angles you never thought were possible.
The petite Teabag model looks like nothing more than the perfect pillow to the unknowing. However, the pyramid-shaped piece will become your favourite aid when it comes to leaving the confines of the bedroom behind, and taking sexual bliss to the next level – on the floor, on the table or on the stairs – making sure comfort comes first thanks to their durable and ergonomic engineering.
One of our favourite shapes, La Fusion, is (unsurprisingly) the one that has the most positions illustrated in Simple Ex’s catalogue. The heavy-duty piece helps fuse a couple’s bodies in ways you wouldn’t have imagine, thanks to its extreme dip, giving leverage for both males and females to position themselves and their partners for maximum pleasure.
Let your love be the star of the show with the cutely called Butterfly – a two-piece futon that folds up into a perfect square when it’s not in use. When it is in use, however, imagine the possibilities.
“Our innate intention is to revive sexual pleasure between married couples, and to add novelty to the mundane life, bonding the couples together, and increasing desire for a long term commitment. Our aim and promise is happiness for everyone,” One of the founders of Simply EX products explains. “Our products form a perfect wedding gift for new weds, and can stop a lot of divorces as good sex may prevent lots of divorces.”
Simply Ex products are made of a dense yet soft foam, that retains its shape just enough to give your sexual adventures support, without the usual bangs and bruises you might get from being adventurous around the home. Starting from just 459LE, with the most advanced model coming at 2350 LE, it’s a great gift for newly-weds, while older couples don’t have to spend a lot to get their sex lives back on the right track. With endless colour combinations, and the option of having you and your spouse’s initials embroidered into the pieces, we imagine Simply Ex will soon be a household name, for those in the know. One tip from the CairoScene team: the positions illustrated in their catalogues are just suggestions – go ahead and find your favourite.
Illustrations by MO4 Network Productions.