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Top 8 Types of Likes

Facebook has become part of our every day lives, so much so that we often use it blindly and without thinking. We decided to psychoanalyse the top eight reasons you Like a post...

Our generation simply does not have time to elucidate how we feel; we have e-mails to respond to, birds to flap, Instagrams to filter... So we go ahead with the obviation of passion and interest: we simple LIKE or do not LIKE. Unfortunately, this new psycho-Facebook phenomenon breeds a strange type on neurotic, insular thinking when we do go ahead and decide to put our hands on a mouse which will then hover over our avatar hands which will then maybe, possibly, click on another hand. Here is the top eight reasons you LIKE a post on Facebook, as researched by our team of psycho-Facebook automagic analysts...

The Caught Blue and White Handed Like!

You've seen your girlfriend/boyfriends posting an inside joke on another guy's/girl's wall, you've seen a picture of your friend out at the exact time they said they were too busy to hang. They must know you know. LIKE!

The Love Me Like!

Yes, go ahead and like every single photo of the person you have a crush on, we're sure that will make them notice you and click on your profile and see your own photos and fall in love with you or maybe even ask you out through a Facebook message and at no point during this process will the object of your desire be sitting on their laptop and turn to a near by friend and murmur "Oh who the fuck is this chick/dude who keeps liking everything I do?" and the friend will not reply "stalker neek."

The I'm Cool Too Like!

Someone has posted a track from an obscure musician you love, a quote from an Eastern European philosopher you know or a picture from artist you once read about. They must know that you also share an affinity for these intellectual knick knacks of culture. Like!

The Likewagon!

Shit, shit, 99 people have liked this post and it's only been up for 10 minutes. It doesn't quite appeal to your tastes or you don't quite understand the punch line but everyone else likes it. It must be liked. It just must.

The Oops Like!

You didn't mean to like that post, now everyone thinks you really like Rihanna/the death of a relative/Ikhwan. This is kind of embarrassing.

The Bravo Like!

Someone's just announced some big accomplishment that only means something to them and them alone. You don't know what a Beatport chart or an MBBCh is but you feel forced to like the post for the sake of niceties.

The Consumerism Like!

Like this post and win a lifetime supply of guilt for selling another little piece of your soul to a multinational corporation who will probably just give the prize to one of their staff anyways.

The Can't Hide Like!

You've been tagged in the post, it's kind of a retarded post or picture that you wish they didn't post but don't want to be rude or pedantic enough to ask them to remove it. You contemplate just not posting or being active at all on Facebook for a few hours, days even, to avoid liking the persons post. Alas, the Like just seems like the easier option.