Saturday April 20th, 2024
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13 Life Lessons We Learned on Craigslist

Egypt's internet users aren't really known for their tact, so it's no surprise that the web's most infamous site is full of unintentional wisdom...

Staff Writer

13 Life Lessons We Learned on Craigslist

Egypt's Craigslist is a treasure chest of life advice. Many very wise locals have shared their wisdom or passions to teach us important lessons. We have dug deep to find the most important silver linings from the infamous classified ads site:

#1: The first thing you should ask potential partners is "What's your favourite colour?"

Someone looking for an "adventure" is usually very evidently looking for some action. Not this man! He teaches us that "adventure" can mean getting to know someone deeply. For this to work out the basics of relationships have to be clear right away though. Just imagine someone replies saying their favorite colour is yellow, what kind of person would do that?!

#2: Cheating on your husband with another woman is not cheating. 

This woman is offering her own house as the location of this act of infidelity. But wait a minute, is it really infidelity? Obviously it is not otherwise she would maybe be thinking about finding a different spot. Makes sense, really!

#3: Looking for a lover on Craigslist is classy, of all things.

There are many ways to meet a potential love interest: in clubs, in cafes, on the street, at your job and many more places. The classiest of them all is, however, writing exactly what you want in a cute and charming Craigslist post and wait for cupid to do the rest. Only gentlemen would...

#4: Dating younger guys is bad! 

Gosh, these older women going for younger guys are just gross. The tricks they use to hook up with youngsters are despicable. We're so glad this woman warned us!

#5: Virginity is overrated!

Remember how you were brought up to believe that losing your virginity is a sacred thing you should experience with a special person? This guy proves that wrong, offering his virginity to anyone. He has no preference. About anything. 

#6: Female friendships don't exist in Egypt.

This disheartened individual has apparently tried to have female friends around here and failed. She is so disappointed, all she seems to care about is warning others. If anyone sees a lonely 36-year old woman somewhere, chances are it's her.

#7: Some people consider making love partnerships an animal sexual relation

Why does this person looking for a "love making partner" have to specify he is not looking to make love to animals? We have to have missed the fact these two principles are related, but thanks for enlightening us, young man!

#8: Life is all about passion!

This man is a preacher. No more words necessary!

#9: Being a nymphomaniac is a real and scary disease!

It must be horrible to be a nymphomaniac. Thankfully, there are people out there that are willing to speak to the affected of this terrible condition anyways. This man is interested in nymphomaniacs. For scientific reasons, of course!

#10: If your own efforts don't suffice, pay someone to set you up with expats.

Don't try online dating or bother going out more than usual. No, no, no. Pay other expats to throw their friends under the bus and pass on some numbers - that's the key to finding new love!

#11: Women love to be degraded!

Women of Cairo, rejoice. There are men out there who will humiliate, molest and degrade you. Strangers. Complete strangers that don't know you. How lovely! No more need for tyrant husbands.

#12: Spanking is a hobby!

People reinvent themselves every day and try new hobbies: some play football, some sing in a choir and some spank... sure! It can be confusing to have this urge to spank or to be spanked. It is an everyday struggle for this guy who is wondering what spanking is like. They do make it sound fun in 50 Shades though, don't they?

#13: Sex is preeeetty good for you!

Last but not least, this guy took some time to educate us about the many, many benefits sex has. Such wisdom should not be kept from anyone. 

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