Beyoncé

So the VMAs happened last night. Katy Perry pretended she was Britney Spears, Nicki Minaj performed like 15 times, Taylor Swift wore a weird outfit that looked like it was from Sxy’s in Mohandessin and all these other people I have no clue about came out to pretend to be relevant. Yes, yes we understand, but then Beyoncé. 

There is literally nothing else worth talking about. I know, I know, but let me be clear about something before I continue. I have started to hate her, because it’s just all so fucking much and her Instagram posts really started to get on my nerves. I unfollowed her already because I couldn’t deal with the faces and the pretend love she has with Jay Z. But then every time I’m about to get over her and be like, she’s so annoying and I can’t deal with her anymore, she comes out and is all like fuck everyone, literally not one other bitch can do it like I do it. In this case, she just strutted on stage and performed her whole album. She barely even broke a sweat. I hate her so passionately and vow to get over her, and then she’s just literally chilling on stage and I can’t help but literally bow down to the greatness that is this freak of nature. What drugs are she on? Everything she does basically translates to “all y’all bitches can just try.” I don’t have the words so I am going to express myself in GIFs right now.  

But here is the video first:

She’s just chilling. Do robotics with my head, I don’t even need to catch my breath.

Hi Nicki, Taylor, Katy/Britney/Jeans Woman

Here’s Nicki just for good measure/comparison purposes

OK Nicki, that’s cool, but can you do this?

Oh my God, look at her butt.

Wait! Let me fix my hair.

“I’m so full.” We all are B, we all are.

Here are the Kardashians wondering what talent is:

Ya.