5 Types of Roommates in Egypt
If you've moved out, you probably found yourself living with at least 2 of these kinds of people.
While we're blessed with an infantilising culture in which we can casually live in our childhood rooms well into our retirement, some of us still voluntarily chose to move out way before that to chase the ever-elusive sense of the independence. In the process, we find ourselves in living situations with more kinds of people than we thought existed; some of them good, some of them bad, and some of them really ugly! In our never-ending search for the right roommate, most of us find that there are at least 5 types of roommates Egypt has an abundance of, check them out:
The Responsible One
Pop-up quiz: can you guess which is The Responsible in this video?
This is basically a replica of your mum, minus the genuine compassion and with the ability to operate a smart phone. They're on top of their shit and they will damn well make sure you're also on top of yours when it comes to house chorus and duties. It's good to have that sort of motherly figure around, but you might as well have stayed with your actual mum; much less hassle and self-cleaning cups. The new instant pay feature on Emirates NBD's mobile banking app will probably come in handy for this type of roommate.
The Clumsy One
Boogy or electricity? Boogy! Always Boogy.
On the other end of the spectrum lies The Clumsy One. They go hand-in-hand with The Responsible One as they're obviously not ready to let go of their carefree attitude when it comes to real responsibilities. You can count on them for sincere apologies minutes after they break your expensive watch and they consistently fail to under why you're so freaked out about them casually forgetting to pay the electricity bill.
This is the closest you'll get to actually living completely on your own while still having someone share your rent. They're always off somewhere for extended periods of time that you might actually mistake them for a stranger when you do spot them around the house. It might be relieving to finally have all that space to yourself but someone human interaction every now and then can go a long way.
The Paranoid Type
Pretty self-explanatory; this is the person that purges into your room in the middle of the night to inquire on what they believe is a great conspiracy behind that stain on the couch. They're constantly scanning you for signs of betrayal and more often than not you will find yourself a defendant in the case of the Lost T-shirt with no evidence on your whereabouts around the estimated time it went missing. It might be a good time to invest in a CCTV camera or move out before you find yourself standing before a judge screaming "IT WAS SELF-DEFENSE'.
"Do you need that lighter?", "Was that your bottle of wine?", "Do you have those two pounds you borrowed last May?", are the kind of questions you need to be on the lookout for so you can early-detect The Free-Loader before you find yourself virtually penniless. They'll 'get you back next time' and you've lost count on how many times they 'lost their bank card'. If you find yourself seriously considering investing a safe, it might be time to set sail to a new apartment.
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